Property Grunt

Monday, April 25, 2005

Broker Busybody and other fun things

Today I was doing an open house and while I was talking to the buyers in the elevator a fat squat white woman loudly interrupted me saying that what I said wasn't true and as she left she said I should do my research. I tried to laugh it off. But it really got me pissed because I am familiar with the building and the way she acted was full of malice. I found out from the doormen that the busybody is a broker in the building who used to make major bucks selling and buying in the building but apparently she is entering the willy loman /old Gil/Shelly the machine phase in her life.

I ran into her again in the elevator and when we got out I yelled out loud to the BIC about the history of the building in front of the Busybody, he responded that he heard someone challenged you on that. I pointed out the Busybody as she was leaving he shrugged that she was just a miserable broker.

I hate brokers who start trouble for no reason. No wonder she is not the hot dog she once was. Who would want to work with such a negative little wretch?

The open house was slow probably because of passover however it did not limit its entertainment appeal. A woman came in demanding why the apartment was so expensive. It became this bipolar conversation where I tried to explain the market and she would shoot back that she did her research and then she would say I am not here to do your job your the expert in this field.

I was not in the mood to play games with her so I brought her down to the BIC where she engaged in him in her devil talk.

The most amusing moment was when a resident came to look at that aparment. She was in the same line but on a high floor. When she heard the price she almost had a heart attack. She had closed on her unit in July in the 400 price range. The current apartment was on the market for 300 more.

Afterwards I went to show one of my rental listing. The client asked if the fee could be reduced. I laughed at her and explained not in this market. She was a sneaky one because she put an application on an apartment already. But it was worth laughing at her. I always had to bite my tongue as a rental broker when I was asked these types of questions.

Nasty stuff in the NYT. Not only about open houses but a woman using her influence in the condo board to force a neighbor to sell to her. Real estate is dirty. The Grunt accepts that. But to take advantage of an eldery woman pisses off the Grunt to no end. Ann H. Cook may deny any wrongdoing and the board is practicing CYA by not disclosing but its damn obvious that she was playing dirty pool.

The Closing Day Disaters article was hilarious. The Grunt can relate. At one closing the buyer and seller were at each others throats because the buyer kept asking to see the apartment to take measurements for renovation purposes before the closing.

After the closing went down, the buyer got pissed because the seller ripped out the kitchen cabinets and the buyer wanted them back depsite the fact that buyer hated them and was going to gut the kitchen anyway. The buyer just wanted to piss off the seller.

A lawyer once told me about a closing that nearly imploded. This buyer put an offer on an aparment on the condition that a set of large antique mirrors that were in the apartment would be part of the deal. The owner agreed and the offer was accepted. Closing day arrived and the buyer did the walkaround and much to her horror the mirrors were gone.

Her broker had forgotten to tell the lawyer to include the condition regarding posession of the mirrors in the contract. The seller did not and freely absconded with them and was not giving them back.

The buyer was in tears, her mother was on the phone screaming for her to walk out. The lawyer took the broker aside and told him point blank he was on the verge of losing the deal if he didn't do something. The two brokers put their heads together and agreed to each give up a signifigant portion of their commission to the buyer to cover the mirrors.

Btw, Joyce Cohen informed me that it was "a figment of my imagination" that she would be calling me out on my last entry. I stand corrected Ms. Cohen and once again I am humbled by the Huntress herself. When will I ever learn never to second guess such an esteemed member of the press?