Property Grunt

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Jim Cramer is a douche bag


The fresh smell of douche.




It is a well-known fact that Jim Kramer is a douche bag but in the last two days on the Today show he was in rare form.

Go to this link for the douchebag experience.

That day the market took a beating and then he appeared again on Tuesday’s Today show defending his position. Among viewers the general consensus was that Cramer might not have been the cause of the stock market plummeting but there were others that believed that he probably had some type of influence. One viewer wrote in an email that hat Cramer was doing was tantamount to yelling fire in a crowded room. His response what if there is a fire? My response is that certainly adding to the panic does not help.

Why am I so angry with this self-described finance expert who has proven to be just a snake oil salesman? Because I know what he is really up to.

First of all I have very little experience in finance. However, I am making the effort to educate myself about investing because sooner or later I am going to have retire and I am not counting on social security to help me out. But from I have learned about the investing I realize Cramer is promoting self-sabotage by telling people to get out of the market.

Let me ask this question. What happens when you sell your stock? Depending on when you sold it, you are going to receive what it is worth on the market. Do you get that entire amount? No. A piece of the action is taken from the sale for transaction fees and taxes.


Do you see where I am going with this? The party that is the primary beneficiary is the broker that handles your stocks not you. And after you pay them you have to pay the taxman who is knocking on your door for their cut. Of course this does not affect the broker, since the you are the one left holding the bag.

Under this veneer of financial martyrdom, Cramer has positioned himself to present this advice as helping the people when in fact he is only helping his colleagues. The fact of the matter is that Cramer has used a broad-brush stroke and applied it to the general population without considering the first rule of investing which is that it is always subjective.


I would like to take a 180 and talk about one of my favorite subjects. Bruce Lee.



To this day, Bruce Lee is still a powerful influence on all martial artists, in fact there are many who devote themselves in becoming the next Bruce Lee. What people fail to understand is that there is only one Bruce Lee. The way he moved on screen was the product of hard work, talent and his own personal expression. What makes it all the more fruitless for martial artists trying to fight like Bruce Lee is that they use his movies as a primary reference. How he fought in movies was very different in how he fought in life.

After his death there were a ton of Bruce Lee clones from Bruce Lai to Bruce Li to Bruce Le. Their vague resemblance to Bruce Lee paralleled their marital arts skill or lack thereof. Jackie Chan initially struggled in his career because he was presenting himself as the next Bruce Lee, which he wasn’t. Instead he developed his unique brand of kung fu comedy, which he is now famous for.


What worked for Bruce Lee not work for others. The same applies to investing. That is why there is only one Warren Buffet. Millions of people constantly emulate the man but they never come close since since they do not have his experience, resources and infrastructure.

What people need to do is take a serious and hard look at themselves, beginning with a personal finanical statement which is not that hard to do. Just go to this link .

By looking at their assets and liabilities they can get a better idea of where they stand and what they need to do. People may realize that it might be better for them in the long run to keep their money in the market. If they need to liquidate their stocks, fine, but they have to determine if it will be worth it to incur the additional liabilities of processing fees and taxes.

Whether the market is going up or down, there is always a way to make money. Right now the credit markets are locked up like Miley Cyrus’s virginity which is what is freaking everyone out since the financial markets are immobilized. What Cramer is doing is trying to unlock this stagnancy by having as many people liquidate as possible so at least his buddies get paid. In other words, if his buddies can't borrow any money then they can at least milk it from another source which is their own client base.

The savvy investor will stay in the market until the turnaround, because it is too late to leave and they are just going to be burdened with additional costs anyway. What the savvy investor does is wait, gather up their cash and begin to cherry pick the best stocks that are now plummeting to bulk rate prices. The primary directive for successful investing is simply this “Buy low and sell high.” And things are looking very low right now and may even go lower.


Am I telling you to jump into the market? F**k no! What I am telling you is to take a very hard look at yourself. See where you are with your finances and determine what your wants and needs are and how they fit in with your life. And please be aware of that a decision to sell your stocks should not be taken lightly due to the transaction fees and taxes you will be incurring.

If you need to liquidate, then liquidate but for the love of God do it for the right reasons not because Jim Cramer told you to. And don’t stay in the market because I told you to. It all comes down what feels right for you.